If she Lived
by charlie.e.a
Summary: SPOILERS- The setting is after Allegiant, but instead of Tris dying, Caleb dies instead. (Tris and Tobias are alive, Caleb is dead). This is what their lives are like now.
1. Chapter 1

**Authors note: SPOILERS The setting is after Allegiant, but instead of Tris dying, Caleb goes instead. (Tris and Tobias are alive, Caleb is dead)**

"I can't live like this! I just can't!" Screamed Tris, "I could have gone... I should have gone! He was my brother..." No voices were heard except for Tris's sobs. Her Psychiatrist hastily writes, trying to speak at the same time..

"Tris, please, calm down." Dr. Laurine said in a fake, flat, and soft voice. "Just think, if what happened to your brother happened to you. It's almost impossible for anyone to think of, right? You're brother didn't have people as close to him but you, you... Tobias... Nothing... Him..." Tris only caught one word in every sentence because Dr. Laurine meant nothing. Her words were hallow. Tris let her carry on for a while before blurting out,

"You're saying my brother deserved to die." The room fell silent, and Dr. Laurine's face went red.

"What? No! I didn't mean it like that-"

"What you're saying is that no one loved him? It was better him than me?! His death was better?" Before Dr. Laurine could say anything else, Tris walked out, and before slamming the door, she spat, "I loved him. He was my brother."


	2. Chapter 2

"Tris?" Tobias says, watching the TV. No answer,"Tris?" He says more concerned than before. Tobias turns around to Tris slamming the door close, with her face red and mad, hands in fists. Tobias mutes the TV and then stands up, but before he could say anything, Tris looks at him and runs into his arms. Silence settled over the room, only thing that you could hear were Tris's heavy breaths.

"I lied about what I was doing..." Tris whispered, "I actually have been at the Psychiatrist, but Christina wasn't the patient." Tobias lets go, and they both sit down, Tris now speaking normally. "She wasn't even there... I've been taking your advice. They've been giving me stupid truth serum, and it's definitely been making me talk. I only told them mad I was. I needed to tell someone else..."

"Then... What's wrong then?" Tobias says staring at the TV, with his hands clasped over his legs.

"She said something that she shouldn't of- let's just keep it like that." She kisses him lightly on the cheek, clearly not wanting to talk anymore, then goes in the doorway of their bedroom. "I'll be in bed," she smiles and walks into the room.

Tobias looks at his watch, seeing it's 8PM. He switches off the TV, and follows after Tris.


	3. Chapter 3

Tris POV:

I scream, waking up from my bed, shaking, sweating, confused.

Tobias quickly wakes up, and turns on the lamp next to us.

"What's wrong?!" I can't speak. The nightmare... It was about Caleb, and... and... I just don't want to think about it, I just want to be in Tobias's arms.

I shake my head that has tears strolling down my face, and just crawl up next to him. I don't know what I would do without him...

"Are you okay?" He says quietly, softly kissing my head.

"Y-yes... I'm sorry..." I look at the clock to see it's 3 am and I know... I know i'm dauntless, that's who I am, even if they stopped it all, and we start to live here, in these cities and towns, that faction was who I really am. But this is the hardest thing that I've ever had to deal with. This isn't Dauntless... I'm not strong... This makes even worse than before. I'm crying in Tobias's arms at 3 am.

"What ever the dream was about," but we both very well know what it was, "we'll get past it... I promise you. Together." I listen to his words, as if it is an angel singing the words to me. We lay there, together, as we drift off to sleep once again.

But all I hear as I fall into darkness is Dr. Laurines words in my head. "Just think, if what happened to your brother happened to you... You're brother didn't have people as close to him but you, you... you have Tobias and..." Her making points that it was better him to die than me...

Then the sleep takes over, and then i'm gone.


End file.
